During this year’s thanksgiving weekend, a group us church leader organized “A Night under the Stars”, a one-night camp-out on the grounds of our local church school. We also asked campers to disconnect from their mobile devices and to evaluate what is our true source of connectedness. Are we connected to God Almighty or the almighty mobile device?

You may have heard the saying that “the battle is for the mind.”  That’s because one of the ways we connect with the world and with God is through our thoughts. Connecting constantly with your device influences our thoughts and moods. I’ve proven this in my spiritual walk. My thoughts do impact my spirituality.

This is fuelled in part by what are called common patterns of distorted thinking called cognitive distortions. These distorted thoughts disrupt spiritual growth and cause distress, anxiety and unhealthy feelings and lead us to misinterpret, or to over interpret the data of the world. We also can live abnormal lives or in an exaggerated (embellished) reality.

Joyce Meyer has a very catchy phrase to describe this type of negative thinking. She said that too many people have “stinkin thinkin” or negative thinking. No one is immune from “stinkin thinkin.”  What we choose to think about and dwell on in this life will make or break us and determine what type of person we will end up becoming in this life.

 

The wise man Solomon captures this reality in Proverbs 23:7: “For as he thinks in his heart, so is he.” The key word in this verse, “thinks”, tells us that God is targeting our thought process – what we think about on a daily basis. God really wants to come after our minds and get them properly cleaned up. Many sinful attitudes, fears, resentments, aversions and anxieties come from distorted thinking. While these patterns come from within, they are also ‘open doors’ for satanic influence as the devil can exploit and further twist our experience of reality. The world too is able to exploit cognitive distortions both for profit and for influence (as happens with advertising).

 

My blog this month considers three (out of ten) common cognitive distortions I’ve observed in my interactions with Christians, and consider some of the impacts on our spiritual lives. Next month, I will share my thoughts on how we as Christians can overcome these cognitive distortions.

1. All or Nothing Thinking – There is very little “middle ground” in all or nothing thinking. You see things in black or white categories. If your effort falls short of “perfect”, you see yourself as a total failure. You are either a hero, or a total loser. Small mistakes are seen as total failure. Perhaps a person on diet slips, and has a large piece of cake, and then thinks, I am a total failure. I just gained ten pounds.

There is also the tendency in all or nothing thinking to think that affirming one thing means denying others. Say I have four valuable things in front of me – A, B, C and D. If, for example, I say, I like “A” that means I am somehow saying that B, C and D are of no value whatsoever. Of course, that may not be the case at all.

Similarly, the all or nothing thinker takes offense if your praise someone else because that means they are not praiseworthy. In reality, there are often many different outcomes and possible combinations that are both praiseworthy and acceptable. However, the all or nothing thinker, because of this cognitive distortion has a difficult time remembering and accepting this.

There are any number of issues that revolve around anxiety (e.g. performance anxiety) and fear (fear of failure), resentments and depression that set in because of this cognitive distortion. At the personal level the result is either pride, where one thinks of themselves or their performance too highly, or low self-esteem where one, seeing something less than perfect in their performance deems themselves to be a total loser.

Socially, there is often hostility to all opinions that are not 100 percent in step with what the all or nothing thinker claims is best. Such people often take offense when none is intended.

Affirming someone else’s thoughts or opinions, for example, means you’re are discarding or ridiculing the all or nothing thinker’s views and opinions. In this way, all or nothing thinking tends to make people hostile, fearful, thin-skinned and unnecessarily insistent on perfect agreement or outcomes. The distortion leads them to scorn and even ridicule people unnecessarily. Thus, the Devil can easily lock the all or nothing thinker into ever deepening degrees of negativity, anxiety and fear.

2. Emotional Reasoning – A person assumes that their negative emotions necessarily reflect the way things really are: “I feel it. Therefore, it must be true.” “I feel anxious when I fly, so airplanes are not safe.” That I am feeling bad about what happened at a church service does not mean it was a bad church service.

Feelings like these have the capacity to halt reason. We need to be very careful to remember that feelings are just feelings. While they ought not to be wholly discounted, neither should they be the deciding factor. Many of our feelings are flat out wrong, simply mistaken or grounded in deep-seated trauma or powerful past events. It’s therefore important to remember that feelings are just that – feelings.

Several years ago, I was walking with a friend when a dog broke free from its owner and came running up to us. I have a fear of dogs having been bitten three times, including our family dog o the last occasion. While I was afraid of dogs, my friend like dogs.  She had grown up with them and could see that the dog was lumbering up to us to greet us rather than attack us. Both of us were looking at the same data, and both of us had different feelings. She was right, there was nothing to fear. The dog came, sniffed her hand, wagged its tail, and then looked at me. No harm.

The point is that nether set of feelings changed the reality even though hers were right and mine were wrong. Moreover, it’s not difficult to see how the Devil and the world can easily exploit our feelings to make us think things are not necessarily how they are. An important part of spiritual growth is to learn how to discern feelings, and see them as part of the picture, not the whole picture.

3. Jumping to Conclusions –This cognitive distortion is manifested in two ways:

Mind reading: You arbitrarily conclude that someone is reacting negatively to you, and don’t bother to check it out. “I just know he/she thought I was an idiot,” even though he/she acted nicely.

Fortune telling error: A person jumps to conclusions about what others are thinking and feeling about us and assume it is negative, without any evidence. “Natalie didn’t stop to say hello. She must be angry at me.” Well, perhaps, or perhaps too she was in a hurry, or maybe she didn’t even see you or know you were there. Or, Pastor B cast a negative glance at me. He must be upset; I am going to lose my position. Maybe, or perhaps as he was looking in your direction he remembered something he forgot to do, or an argument he had with his wife. Perhaps too, he is hurrying to the bathroom.

Jumping to conclusions lads to many needless and baseless fears and anxieties. Mind reading for instance, is rooted in pride because we trust too much that we have command all the facts and really know what is going on when we don’t. This is a distortion. We must cultivate a healthy type of reserve in our conclusions about what the others are thinking or about their motives.  We ought to ask of God a certain kind of “blindness” that fails to notice so many things we really don’t even understand.

The fortune telling error distortion is often rooted in a form of pride called grandiosity or showiness, where we think we are always the main thing on other people’s mind, or the reason they act. I once knew a man who was very paranoid about people of a quiet disposition. Someone was always thinking badly about him. I would often remind him that people had better things to do with their time than think of him or ways to trip him up.

A key aim of spiritual growth is the renewal of our minds. In the sanctification process, the lord wants to put right thinking into our minds and private thought processes. This kind of inner transformation or sanctification can only be accomplished if we are willing to fully cooperating with the Lord by claiming the incredible, supernatural power of His Holy Spirit that is available to us.

As a starting point, learning to recognize and name the common forms of distorted thinking can be useful.  Once known, we can gain the mastery over these mental hurdles and begin to experience greater freedom and authority over our thoughts. Since most feelings come from thoughts, our emotional life will also be in greater balance.  This includes having authority over, and freedom from anxiety, anger, and sadness.

How can this happen?

Next month, I will share some of the biblical assurances God has provided to help us change what we choose to think about and dwell on. Stay tuned!